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Top 20 things Optimus Prime would NEVER say!20.) "This cat is delicious!"
19.) "Do these flames make me look fat?"
18.) "You know you're just stumped from my imminent beauty!"
17.) "I like a cheeseburger, with no onions, no lettuce, and extra pickles. If I don't see any pickles, I will sit on top of this fast food restaurant and everyone in it as well!..............may I have some fries as well?"
16.) "I don't care if I am the designated driver, YOU'RE NOT DRINKING INSIDE ME!"
15.) "There are just some days, you can't get rid of Rodimus."
14.) *sings* "I got the touch! I got the POWEEEEERRRRRR! DUN DUNDUNDUNDUNDUN! YEAH!"
13.) "In all these centuries of fighting, I've come to ask you the one question, I dared not ask Megatron.............................Is that a helmet? Or a bucket on your head? I never could tell?
12.) "We will protect mankind and all of there, waitaminute!..............$4.99 for re
Revisioning DarwinSometimes I'm jealous of pandas
because they are the most retarded animals
that I know of, but still
They take a leak on Darwin
And prove that PR has it's use
in the animal kingdom as well
Maybe they can give a seminar to slugs?
RU: Rutariowe Wspominki (KONKURS)
K O N K U R S
Po całym dniu zajęć, wróciłeś zmęczony do swojego pokoju w akademiku. Wiedziałeś, że powinieneś odpocząć, jednak zdawałeś sobie sprawę, że masz bardzo dużo pracy domowej, za którą należałoby się w końcu zabrać.
Zrezygnowany, powlokłeś się do biurka i sięgnąłeś po pierwszą, lepszą książkę.
Po pewnym czasie, usłyszałeś stukanie, więc podniosłeś wzrok znad podręcznika.
Okazało się, że na parapecie za oknem Twojego pokoju siedzi szkolny kruk.
Do jego nóżki, przyczepiona była fioletowa koperta z godłem uniwersytetu.
Wstałeś by czym prędzej wpuścić ptaka do środka i odczytać wiadomość, choć nie spodziewałeś się niczego dob
Positively PuppyMaturely I do say icky--
but for being rather sticky;
I would like--
to be the merrier and
say I'd like that it is dread--
ful to think of its odor---
a pugilist-like motor.
A repulsive, feeble callus
I can't cut off the foot of malice,
I swear I'll grit my teeth
and strangle it 'till it dies.
And many other adj-
ectives to describe---
why I hate you.
It's not that I'm pessimistic,
depressed or criminally a best
At the sight; oh what a sight
Just don’t expect me running
when a messy mishap's coming.
Because there is no point
running when you fate is coming,
since I'll be the one standing overflowing,
with a joy of overcoming the
Absolutely adorable, fluffy--
because I will hold the axe when you die.
Now don't cry your children's eyes out.
There much better pets out there for a child, my love.
The creature, or an octopus, Aristotle's faithful cous-
There is no need to cry--
Oh it only deserved to die---
InsomniaI close my eyes.
I lay my head on my pillow.
I recount everything that happened today.
Every little detail.
Every good, bad, sad, terrifying, beautiful thing.
I hone in on it all and dissect it all.
Then I remember.
Why did he say that to me?
What did I do to deserve that?
Am I just wallowing in self pity?
I open my eyes.
I walk to the kitchen.
I walk to the sink and pour myself a glass of water.
I grab some melatonin from the cabinet.
I take my five milligrams.
I go back into my room and crawl into bed.
I close my eyes and go to my happy place.
I go to my cabin in the woods.
I step inside.
I light a fire in the fire place.
I go to get some food out of the fridge.
I am appalled to see that someone stole all my food.
I open my eyes.
I go to the kitchen.
I pour myself a glass of Pepsi.
I go back to my room.
I open my laptop.
I search “burglary statistics”.
I read through a few webpages.
My eyes begin to strain and creak shut.
I look over at my clock.
Iiiiice CreamNo parents are home
I'm all alone
Ice cream in the freezer
I'll pick out a cone
How can I stop
When there's no one to
hold me back
Snag a popcicle or two
The weathers warmin' up
Don't let it melt
Get too hot
may as well stuff it in your belt
I'm so obsessed
With this summertime--
Can't get it out of my head--
This ice cream rhyme
I should stop
I'm feelin' sick
But wait, please,
just one more lick
Day eight.Sometimes I wonder if my funeral will be a celebration.
If my family will smile,
throw my things on a trash pile,
happ'ly thinking all the while
"I'm glad you're gone, you asshole."
If my friends will gather round
as I'm dropped in to the ground
making quite a joyous sound
of "I never liked her anyway."
Because Boredomif you look at the big picture
you will see that we are all going to die
in all probability
and the world will end
possibly in explosions
(explosions are so majestic)
so if life is gonna end
why do we try so hard
in individuality, as a group, nations, and as a planet
to make marks in the dust
in the sand
of this infinite beach
that we call our home
why do we ask the meaning of life
and try so HARD in school
and spend taxes on ice cream trucks
and scour the galaxy
for interestingly unique bacteria
(that will probably just give us interestingly unique diseases)
and take time to save the lemurs
and if the world will end
why do we train for marathons
and lose the game
and watch dumb sitcoms
with terrible acting
and plot holes the size of Nebraska
(SERIOUSLY! SHE DOES NOT LIKE YOU! GET OVER IT!)
and if the world will end
why am i sitting on the couch
typing this unnecessarily long and moderately depressing poem
just so you can read it
(and possibly laugh)
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Bluefley has a gallery filled with artwork that whisks you off in to a Sci-fi daydream, and keeps you captivated for hours. Marc has been a member of our community for over a decade and has achieved nothing but success with his astounding commitment to interacting with the community, sharing a prolific amount of video tutorials and generally being an all round rockstar deviant. It is no joke that we are absolutely delighted to award the Deviousness Award for April 2014 to ... Read More